Moody Muskrat

https://www.katemessner.com/cheerful-chick-learning-from-a-mentor-text/

Teachers Write 717/19

Martha Brockenbrough’s CHEERFUL CHICK, illustrated by Brian Won, is a celebration of both cheerleading and determination. It’s a great mentor text for us to study as we take a look at the way the topic and theme of a book guide decisions about rhyme and meter.

Remember the cheers you heard at basketball and football games? There’s probably one catchy cheer that comes to mind right away. For me, it’s this one:

We got spirit, yes we do!
We got spirit, how ‘bout you?

It has a peppy meter to go along with the rhyme.

DAH da DAH da DAH da DAH!
DAH da DAH da. DAH da DAH?

Martha kept that element of cheerleading in mind when she chose her rhyme scheme and meter for CHEERFUL CHICK. It’s written in iambic tetrameter, so each line is made up of four iambs. In other words, it goes like this:

da DAH da DAH da DAH da DAH….

Interestingly enough, Martha’s first draft of this book wasn’t written in rhyme. As an experienced writer, she knew about all the pitfalls of writing in rhyme and opted to try it in prose instead. But when she sent the manuscript to her editor, Arthur Levine, he suggested that this is a story that might actually work better with the added challenge of rhyme.

“Since I already had the character and story, though, the challenge was to come up with a rhythm and rhyme scheme that echoed the cheerleading protagonist’s nature,” Martha wrote in an April tweet thread.

She came up with a plan to give iambic tetrameter a try. When I look at how this book turned out, I can only imagine how much fine-tuning and revision went into making this work. But the end result is a book that captures the main character’s nature and rhymes without feeling forced or clunky. It reads like a cheer, which is perfect.

Cheerful chick worked day and night
Until at last her moves felt right.

And then she hatched her lifelong dream
To build a barnyard cheering team.

She got her muscles good and warm
And did her moves with perfect form:

Side splits, wing stands, super punches –
Chicken shook her feathers bunches!

That last line was fun, wasn’t it? When we were looking at Hena’s GOLDEN DOMES AND SILVER LANTERNS yesterday, we talked about the care she took to make sure the rhymes felt natural and didn’t call attention to themselves, because that’s a gentle, lyrical story about colors. CHEERFUL CHICK has a more playful, humorous tone, so it’s fine (and fun!) if some of the rhymes stand out a bit more:

Ms. Cow knows all the wildest moves.
Just watch her stand on two front hooves!

Ms. Cow just stood and blinked and chewed.
And said, “I’m so not in the moooood.”

On that note…here’s your assignment. We’re going to play around with some different voices today. Choose a character — a young person, a big old tortoise, a rowdy squirrel…whatever you want — and try writing a few lines in that character’s voice. It can be about anything – what the character loves, their plans for the day, their dreams for the future. But give some real thought to how the rhythm and word choice will reflect the character. When you’ve written a few lines, switch gears and write about the same topic but in a different character’s voice. How does that change how you think about meter and rhyme?

My response:

My friend and I were on a hike today, and we encountered a rattle snake. Funny, because I wrote about a snake yesterday. Anyway, I had read the post before I left and asked her to think of a fun animal. We came up with Moody Muskrat. I am on the west coast, wanted to post sooner. Here is my attempt. The second to the last line has too many syllables, but I liked the word scampered. I will have to keep working on it.

Moody muskrat slept snug in his bed.
It's time for school, his mother said.

Moody muskrat, blanket in tow
Please momma, I don't want to go.

Your teacher is a wise old owl
Comb your fur, and fix your scowl.

But I don't like reading out loud
Rather swim and gaze at the clouds.

Momma packed his lunch, out he went,
Long tail barely swishing, head bent.

Chirpy chipmunk scampered into a run
C'mon friend, school can be fun.

Owl's smile extended warm and bright

As little animals crowded in tight.

Story time, a favorite for all

Moody muskrat had to sit up tall.

Scary forest and a magic fairy 

His scowl disappeared, just barely

Moody muskrat still couldn't see

Rabbit, your ears are too close to me!

Just talk nicely, Owl reminded all

Moody muskrat's face began to fall.

pass

story

be, tea, me, be, free, knee

Hand raised, Can we read once more?

 

for, galore, store, more